#233 Narcissists Want the Crown, Leaders Grow the Kingdom

Leadership isn't about pursuing titles but developing others to reach their potential. Our conversation explores how leadership perspectives evolve from seeking positions to focusing on creating meaningful impact and building capable teams.

• Shifting from wanting leadership positions to prioritizing good work and social influence
• How leadership positions naturally attract narcissistic personalities
• The distinction between self-serving leaders and those who develop others
• John Maxwell's philosophy of leadership as creating more leaders
• Leadership as a "talent pipeline" that transforms organizations over time
• Application of leadership principles in coaching contexts
• The challenges and rewards of leadership in various settings

Chapters

• 0:00 Changing Views on Leadership
• 2:38 Leadership and Narcissism
• 4:02 Coaching as Leadership
• 6:06 The Challenges of Coaching

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:59

Hey you guys ready for the next question?

Speaker 2: 1:01

Yes.

Speaker 1: 1:02

All right, wait a minute, wait a minute. Okay.

Speaker 2: 1:07

I think my views have changed over time. Don't leave me out.

Speaker 2: 1:11

Oh okay, no, I used to want to be the leader and I always thought that was the goal and it's really shouldn't be, really um, I've I've since learned I've seen people who want to be the leader and those are usually the people you don't want to be under um, so that's. My view has changed there, uh, that I wanted to be the leader. Now I don't want to be the leader, but I do want to do a good job and I want to employ good, uh, social skills and influence. And if that translates into leadership, a leadership position, it probably will, but I'm not no longer chasing the leadership position.

Speaker 1: 2:14

I'm done. I also read another book just real quick. Sorry, Liz.

Speaker 1: 2:19

No you're fine that I was talking about. This was kind of like about. It's about leadership, but they said that leadership positions attract narcissists like flies to honey. It is highly attractive for somebody and Scott was just referring to this who just wants to be in a position of leadership because they're trying to pursue their own narcissistic ends. But that's not to say that everybody who is in a leadership position is a narcissist or has overbearing narcissistic tendencies, because somebody if you're a John Maxwell fan and you are 100% charged up about leading a team of people charged up about leading a team of people because your goal is to create as many great leaders as you possibly can You're helping people get the most out of their careers and their jobs and what you're really trying to do is create a team of people who are capable of being great leaders in other parts of the organization and, as a result, you become, as a leader, this incredible pipeline of talent where people leave your team and they go on to be the manager of you know, the paint department, the lumber department this guy over here is the lumber sales guy.

Speaker 1: 3:41

You know whatever you know they become leaders and then they go out having under your tutelage and they have their own teams at that point, and then they replicate what they learned under you, and so in that way you multiply that kind of philosophy and presence throughout the company and your company over time becomes high performing. So there's that kind of leader too, and I think you know, for people who are charged up's that kind of leader too, and, and I think you know, for for people who are charged up about that kind of leadership, I think you can't have enough of them, and so I I think for that, that kind of person would be the kind of person who who has, you know, leadership is something they want to do, um, and that's a good thing, because you can't get enough of those kinds of people.

Speaker 2: 4:25

And just so you know, ben Liz Draven I call her Draven, that's her middle name. It's a great name, so to me it's Draven. Draven, you're the captain right of the volleyball team, or not?

Speaker 1: 4:38

I was whenever I was playing. Yeah, Now I just coach.

Speaker 2: 4:44

Coach volleyball. Mm-hmm, okay, was playing. Yeah, okay, now I just coach, coach volleyball, okay so yeah she's in a she's definitely in a leadership position as a coach. So, yeah, there's all kinds of ways to apply what we're talking about as a coach. Yeah for sure. Yeah, you can apply, apply all of this. You can make all the mistakes or you can make all the wins, you know.

Speaker 1: 5:04

Right.

Speaker 2: 5:05

As a coach. It's a hard job.

Speaker 1: 5:08

Yes it is, yes, it is.